I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize