but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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