she smelled like a LAN party
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
