Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
