Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
