Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
