Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
