Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
