He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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