The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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