he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
These 21 FaceApped Celebrities Will Make You LOL
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.