Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath