What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
