wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.