opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
