Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize