Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
