Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
cat food counts as protein by the way
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
