Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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