Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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