Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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