Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
