Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
