would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
