I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize
