I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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