I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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