I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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