hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
