Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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