what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
