But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Randomize
