So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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