is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
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