that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Randomize
