I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize