Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
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