i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
