Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
