How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
