look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
