mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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