Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I touched a dick in church today
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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