wake up i wanna do it froggy style
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
