In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
