i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Randomize