just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
