No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize