Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize
