I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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