oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
