I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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